Being raped or sexually assaulted is a very distressing experience which can have long lasting effects. The majority of reported rapes are against women but male rape does happen and the Student Counselling Service will offer support to all casualties of rape. Throughout this page, advice and suggestions are relevant to either gender.
People who have suffered sexual attacks describe feeling frightened, guilty, powerless, angry, ashamed, depressed, numb and/or lacking self-confidence. Sometimes they have difficulty with eating or sleeping. They may lack concentration and find that this makes academic work difficult. Everyone reacts differently and it is not unusual for feelings to change from day to day or for there to be a long gap between the assault and the emotional reaction to it.
It can be difficult to talk about the attack to friends or family, yet it is important to have understanding and support. Talking to a trained person in privacy and confidence can be helpful. You can talk to a counsellor at Queen Mary or contact Rape Crisis Centre or one of the other helplines listed below.
The majority of offences are committed by someone who is known to the person who is raped. The abuser may be a friend, a partner, a fellow student, a relative, a neighbour or a person in authority.
Rape is not always accompanied by other physical violence. Verbal intimidation, threats or emotional blackmail may be used by the abuser. People who are sexually assaulted may react in various ways. Some people scream or fight back while others may become quiet - too shocked to speak or cry out. Paralysed by fear, they may be unable to resist.
If violence is threatened some people may decide not to struggle in the hope of getting away with the least amount of physical harm. Consequently they may or may not have torn clothes or signs of struggle after an assault. Therefore the person who has been raped does not need to show physical injuries to prove that an assault has taken place.
Rape and sexual assault, whether by a stranger or a friend, is never the victim's fault. Rape and sexual assault are always more about the use of force or power to humiliate, control, hurt or violate someone than about sexual desire or passion. There is evidence to suggest that a very large number of attacks are premeditated. Anyone can suffer sexual assault or rape.
The Queen Mary Report and Support page explains what support is available at Queen Mary, including confidential counselling. It also lists external specialist support options. This includes support which is available 24/7. Support is free and confidential.
You can use Report and Support to do any or all of the following: